Best Jokes that have made people laugh for thousands of years – Funny Notes

What’s either a really gross animal issue OR an impressive, magical school?

What’s either a really gross animal issue OR an impressive, magical school?

Hogwarts.

5 1 vote
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
Why did the man take his clock to the vet?

Q: Why did the man take his clock to the vet?
A: Because it had ticks

0 0 votes
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
Five things women love in cats but hate in men which proves they are crazy hypocrites

Five things women love in cats but hate in men which proves they are crazy hypocrites.

1. Cats are covered in body hair.
2. Cats don’t listen.
3. Cats don’t come in when you call.
4. Cats stay out all night.
5. Cats like to be left alone and sleep all day.

0 0 votes
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
Where do snowmen keep their savings?

Where do snowmen keep their savings?

In the snowbank.

0 0 votes
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
Also Because You’re Wearing Short-shorts and Rollerskates

Teenage boy #1: All I’m saying is it’s false advertising. If you suck dick, you should say you suck dick.
Teenage boy #2: But then everyone will think you’re a fag.
Teenage boy #3: No, no way. You’re telling me that just because I meet a guy whose dick I want to suck, people will think I’m a fag?

0 0 votes
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
Why did the giraffe get such bad grades?

Why did the giraffe get such bad grades?

He always had his head stuck in the clouds.

0 0 votes
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?

Q, What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?

A. A carrot.

0 0 votes
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
Why was the gossip disliked at the coffee shop?

Why was the gossip disliked at the coffee shop?

She always spilled the tea.

4 1 vote
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
Love Means Never Having to Say “I’m Puking”

Spanish thug #1: I’m all about love, man, but I never say it, like, I loved my ex.
Spanish thug #2: What is love? And not the general meaning of it.
Spanish thug #1: It’s like feeling sick to your stomach. (pause) Right?
Spanish thug #2: Yeah, that’s good.

0 0 votes
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
What do you call a blind deer?

What do you call a blind deer?
No eye dear.

What do you call a blind deer with a broken leg?
Still no eye dear

What do you call a blind deer with a broken leg that has been castrated?
Still no f*cking eye dear.

4 1 vote
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
Glade Air Freshener can where it’s most needed

Wife working trauma, level 1 hospital. Guy comes in, abdominal pain. Says he was at a party, hasn’t been able to shit for 2 days. Scan shows full size Glade Air Freshener can inserted in his rectum. ‘No idea how it got there.’ Kicker is, it was inserted bottom first, so concave side in, full suction. Wife gives paralytic to relax all his muscles, inserts a hose to equalize pressure double fisted up some dude’s ass to retrieve said Glade can. Operation a success. This is, I believe, the third or fourth large object she has removed from some dude’s ass. I don’t get specifics, just the gist of these stories.

0 0 votes
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
What did the duck say when it bought some lipstick?

What did the duck say when it bought some lipstick?

“Put it on my bill.”

0 0 votes
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
Why is Peter Pan always flying?

Why is Peter Pan always flying?

Because he Neverlands. (I love this joke because it never grows old.)

5 1 vote
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
What does a nosey pepper do?

What does a nosey pepper do?

It gets jalapeño business. 

4 1 vote
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy and the other’s a little lighter.

5 1 vote
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
0 0 votes
😂Funny Rating. 🤣
Subscribe
Notify of
guest

0 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x